Need help with fellow NT bros

10,228
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Joined Mar 19, 2013
OP, just remember that this happens all the time to both sexes. You aren’t being singled out and will not be the last one to go through this. It ****ing sucks but remember this is only temporary, you’ll find someone else who will not take you for granted.

There are millions of women out there...brush your teeth, get the hair right, put on a nice fit and go shoot your shot. High volume, I’m talking Allen Iverson numbers :smokin

 
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Joined Jan 6, 2013
Super Future once said,”I watched my broad give up on me like I'm average
I went back inside the attic count it up and started laughing, HA”

Listen to the fellas, hit gym, travel, and try new things you couldn’t do over the last 11+ years. After my breakup a couple years ago, I got a better paying job two months later and at the age of 31, I completed the Spartan trifecta. Still team washed no doubt but I’m in the best physical shape ever, traveled a whole bunch and met a lot of cool people in the process. You still have your whole life ahead of you, make the most of it.
 
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Joined Nov 30, 2002
Bro, you just got a new lease on life. Not sure if you believe in God or not, but he works in mysterious ways.

Take some time to greave, go to counseling, please go to counseling, I can’t stress this enough. Then really think about the new and improved you. Whatever that next step for you is, strategize on what it’s going to take to get you there. Books, going back to school, working out, whatever. You have an opportunity to grow from this experience. It’ll be a scar, but every scar serves as a lesson.
 

bendover

Supporter
8,155
7,087
Joined Aug 14, 2012
Thanks guys. I appreciate it. I’ll start working on getting through this. Thank you very much everyone

I never met any of y’all but at least I know now that I got people out there for me. I appreciate it
We out here
Better times will come
One step at a time. We all been there before.
 

superblytrife

Supporter
18,157
15,263
Joined Mar 20, 2002
You’re gonna make it boss. Life works itself out, even when it feels like all is lost.

Just remember that your feelings, while valid, are just feelings. They’re not always the truth or reality, so don’t act on them. Allow yourself to feel what you’re feeling, but don’t get mired down in them.

Take time to heal, which will be tough given a pending divorce. But if I were you, I’d get that done ASAP so you can begin to move on without ever having to deal with her again.

JUST BE THANKFUL THAT YOU DON’T HAVE ANY KIDS WITH HER. CUT YOUR LOSSES AND THROW THE DEUCES!!
 
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Joined Feb 28, 2016
OP you’re gonna be straight man. Lots of good advice here. I was in a long term relationship as well and it didn’t end well. Turned out to be a blessing in disguise. It also turned me into a straight-up savage. :pimp:
 
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Joined Nov 24, 2006
Take time to be sad. Mad. Angry. Confused. Question everything. 24 hrs. That is it. After that 24 hrs is done ZERO self pity moving forward.

Delete any and everything that is and was associated with her. Move forward. Not back.

Find a hobby. Book a trip overseas. As others have suggested hit the gym. Go try new things. Make yourself active. If there was anything that you might have put off that you wanted to do but didn't do - go do whatever that was now! The more you sit around the more you will mope and regress.

Believe in YOU. Every single day. Every day above ground is a good day. You, not her get to decide if it will be a good day or not.

There will be times that something triggers a memory of her. Perfume. A song. Maybe a restaurant. That is okay - just remember SHE chose to mess this up NOT you. Don't run from your past. It is part of who you are but ultimately what is going to make you stronger in the long run.

Cliche, and I'm sure hard to hear right now but it to shall pass. You are going to come out on the other side of this a better and more mentally strong person.
 
11,567
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Joined Feb 8, 2009
Honestly considering ending it bro, like my life

**** man, this ***** ruined my life all in the matter of a day.
embarassed me in front of my family, friends, coworkers, her family.

Man my life just feels like it’s over. I’m deadass in a corner of my apartment, with the lights turned off typing this since I have like no one to talk to and I don’t want to get my close family members involved. I don’t know how to go on,

She’s living like she doesn’t give a **** what just happened.
If this isn't some internet BS and you're really thinking about harming yourself, give me a call, I'll DM you my number.
 
36,889
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Joined May 2, 2012
Sorry to hear about this OP. Many have said it before me in here, but time does help. You know you did nothing wrong so don't beat yourself up over it. It ain't worth it.

I think you definitely need to hit up family members and friends, not just this thread.
 

patbarok

Supporter
284
534
Joined Jan 8, 2013
Great advice from the folks in here!

I'm in Queens, as well man-if u want to talk, hit me up! I went tru the something similar (wife & I split) years ago man-therapy (went a few times), gym and new poontang helped!!

Take it day by day and stay focused-only thing you can really do.
 
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Joined Dec 27, 2014
Thanks guys. I appreciate it. I’ll start working on getting through this. Thank you very much everyone

I never met any of y’all but at least I know now that I got people out there for me. I appreciate it
Sorry to hear about your situation. A few things:
  • Weeks, months or years down the road there's a chance she'll come crawling back. Don't take the bait. Her true colors have surfaced. Be fortunate you saw them at a young age. Like the movie 50/50 you'll find yourself in a better situation and probably be thankful this happened when it did.
  • You'll be fine. Breaking up sucks. Gives you an empty feeling. This 100% goes away in time, even if you presently feel like its something that's permanent. Nope, it's not.
  • You're the good guy here. She sucks. Don't forget that.
  • I don't know the law, but if someone is unfaithful, they're not entitled to alimony right? Might want to get your ducks in a row if court is in the future.
  • Keep moving. Don't lamp in bed or on the couch. Go for a walk, to the gym, keep a healthy diet, get some sun, go to the zoo, listen to some upbeat music, read, volunteer. Just keep going. Don't let her actions control you.
  • Buy your boy dinner for tipping you off. Some people don't want to put themselves in that drama but he obviously cares enough about you to do so.
 
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